The Bachelorette (S:13 E:5): Snake Bitten Kenny

Lee v Kenny Continued

Last week we were left with Lee and Kenny getting into a tussle, but this episode opens up with Bryan (finally) getting some time with Rachel. It isn’t much of a conversation as they go straight into making out. Back to the Lee and Kenny encounter, Kenny calls Lee a “snake”. Is that supposed to be a diss? Lee doesn’t care. The best thing about this heated convo is that Iggy and Will are staring at them behind the window.

Forgotten in all this is that there is a group date rose to be given away, which goes to Bryan. Kenny attempts to take a minor shot at Lee by congratulating Bryan on the rose. Kenny ups the ante by going from “snake” to “bitch” in his nickname game with Lee.

Jack Stone 

Remember Jack Stone? Neither do I, but apparently he has a date with Rachel. Jack Stone admits to staring at her, aka being a creeper, so that’s his excuse for not being able to dance. The chemistry between them so far is stone cold, okay, I had to.


Back at the resort hotel, Will makes an appearance and confronts Lee about putting Kenny in a bad position where he’s susceptible to being viewed as an angry black man.

Stone and Rachel are on their dinner date and she looks like she’s ready to empty her lunch as he makes bizarre faces and becomes weirder by the moment. He tells her he wants to take her to Dallas and lock the door and…chat. She’s visibly creeped out, game over Jack. Rachel doesn’t wait another moment to tell him he’s not getting a rose. At least let the dude finish his free meal, cold blooded. Off goes Stone on his quick and lonely walk to the limo.



Early rose ceremony time.

  • Eric
  • Peter
  • Adam
  • Will
  • Matt
  • Alex
  • Josiah
  • Anthony
  • Kenny

The final rose comes down to Lee, Iggy and Jonathan. Lee gets the rose. Gotta keep the villain around a bit longer. Tickle monster gets sent home. The final Chicago guy Iggy gets sent home. The rest of the guys are leaving the country. This must be an extra gut punch for Iggy and Jonathan, getting let go just before everyone heads to Norway.

Oslo Lovin’

So I’m convinced the show has a lifetime deal with Scandinavia, yet another trip there, this time it’s Norway. Apparently the air is really thin in Oslo as Josiah thinks he actually will end up with Rachel. She wastes no time and announces that Bryan will be going on a solo date with her. They date is to go repelling 187 feet down? Sounds romantic to me. Rachel is giddy about how safe he makes her feel, so it must be all the panting he’s doing while repelling. She’s so smitten with him and can’t believe why he’s single by singling out his best qualities which apparently are that he’s so handsome and has a great job, oh, and she adds that he’s nice also. Nice to see her priorities put in order.


Back at the hotel Eric is coming up with theories that Rachel isn’t into black men. At least Anthony seems to be the sane one by putting that theory to rest. Eric must be really bored not getting a date. Meanwhile at dinner Bryan can just about say anything to get Rachel smitten with him. He does let her know he wasn’t a pickup artist in high school, yet it blows my mind a man 37 years of age is going back and talking about his high school days. Apparently that’s all that it takes to convince her to give him a rose. He also sneaks in the mention that he’s falling in love with her.


Handball Adventures

A group date card arrives at the house and everyone is heading on this date besides Kenny and Lee, so we officially have our first two-on-one date of the season. Kenny is seeking some advice from the untouchable Bryan about his upcoming two-on-one. The group date consists of an exciting game of hand ball, not much of a game but dudes wearing spandex chasing each other around with no purpose.

Credit: ABC

Will makes another appearance when he gets some solo time with Rachel. He compares timelines of her getting “hurt” by Nick (huh?) to when he was hurt by someone in his life. First of all buddy your timeline is a little ahead, considering the show tapes months in advance. Josiah gets some solo time, but finally she calls him out on his bullshit when she asks him if he’s rehashing things he’s read about her and not things he wants to know about her. Sounds about right, nailed him, and not in the way he wants her to. Peter sure makes the best of the mingling time by getting her in the hot tub. Assured of getting the group date rose, Peter is stunned when she gives it to little known Will. Ouch.

Two For One

The time has arrived for the two-on-one. A helicopter is there to take Lee and Kenny and one of them won’t be coming back. Kenny gets the first opportunity to talk to Rachel. He lays it all out and it appears that she’s believing that he’s being real and genuine. Lee gets his turn and all he does is throw Kenny under the bus. One guy is just dumping the trash on the other guy, while Kenny seems more focused on Rachel. Even Chad and Corinne could make the obvious choice here of who should be staying, and I don’t mean staying behind in these woods.


She comes back for Kenny and tattle tales again, this time telling him what Lee accused him of. That seems like a fair attempt to give him an opportunity to defend himself. Suddenly Kenny turns a bit neurotic and goes to confront Lee, but he does it in a odd way. I think we are finally seeing Kenny King the wrestler appear. Of course it is to be continued..



Rising: Bryan & Will

Falling: Josiah 

Bryan made a big comeback in this episode. He was in a bit of a lull the last couple episodes, but he sure reminded us why he’s a frontrunner. Peter had a bit of a setback when he didn’t receive the group date rose he expected. Will, yes Will, made some headway and even got a rose. Josiah dropped on a dagger, his time in numbered on this show.

Once again it came down to Lee v Kenny. They finally had that teased two-on-one date and now one of them will be going home. It’s about time, this feud isn’t as exciting as the show makes you want to think it is. It’s really the only thing going in terms of a feud this season with all these mild mannered men. So they stretched out the drama for next episode, which is tomorrow night. My bet is that BOTH will be going home. I think she’s set on keeping Kenny, but he will do something to sabotage himself, maybe get physical with Lee? My take is that both are heading home. Two-on-one will turn into two-on-none.

For more Bachelorette content follow me on Twitter @JimRko 

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