What do these guys need to do to act normal? Certainly they didn’t display any sort of normalcy in episode 2.

Rachel and Bryan Are Back:

One of the least memorable Bachelor couples in recent years make an appearance, Rachel Lindsey and Bryan whatever his last name is? They are officiating or the rule setters for a group date. The wedding obstacle course challenge is so lame it caused shrinkage to several men (ice bucket dip). Lincoln is the winner of this messy challenge, with questionable fair play involved.

Connor Tantrum:

So one of the early favorites, Connor, can’t seem to handle Lincoln’s boasting of his insignificant minor accomplishment. Lincoln puts a framed picture of him and Becca on the table for the guys to see, so Connor does everyone the favor and tosses that as far as he can. That leads wimpy Lincoln to go cry to Becca about it. Just like that Connor ends up in Becca’s doghouse. These children can’t play nice apparently.

Colton Double Dipping:

Colton is double dipping in the Bachelorette pool. What’s the best way to get to Becca? Have a fling with her friend Tia. So honest guy Colton reveals the news to Becca, who seems to have rather heard that she’s gone bankrupt. The devastation she’s projecting is asinine. Apparently, no man in the Bachelor mansion is allowed to date anyone ever, besides her. She’s incredibly petty for having so much angst to him.

On the other end, Colton should have held out till he established a better connection with her before he revealed the news. Don’t rush to break the news dude, you’re not Woj (NBA reporter). This social media DM sliding thing is very real for these Bachelor people.

Smash-It:

Blake gets the lovely opportunity to go on a date with Becca. Great, right? Not really. They get to hang out in some warehouse and smash Arie memorabilia. Every guys dream is to constantly be reminded of your girl’s ex and get to do an activity revolved around the ex. How romantic, no?

Letting It All Out:

Onto the star of this season, our resident model, Jordan. He’s reaching all time levels of Bachelor contestants. His level of Bachelor intellect and thoughtful comebacks is escalating. Jordan decides to let it all out and parade in his undies. To the dismay of every man in the house. This man is above the rest—period. He’s sticking around for a few more episodes at least. A classy intellectually incorrect villain. He’s genuinely entertaining.

Going Home: 

Pointy faced Alex bids farewell along with a couple forgettable guys. Colton makes the final cut. She couldn’t have sent him home. I picked the guy to win it all!

Episode 2 Winners:

Blake had himself a nice night. He managed to separate himself from the pack and get a date with Becca. Willis is definitely on Becca’s radar. Lincoln wins an event and cries about it to Becca, who sides with him. These men are having the best day ever!

Verdict:

Some new favorites are starting to stand out, while initial favorites (Colton & Connor) surprisingly are hanging by a thread. Will they come back to being favorites, or will they be bidding farewell shortly? Early surprises. Please, no more Rachel and Bryan. They are the dullest individuals from the last few seasons.

For more on the Bachelor, you can follow me on Twitter @TheJimAlexander and check out my podcast Bachelor Universe